Dear Dr. Schoenfeld,
Regarding your column warning about literal blow jobs.
A few years ago, one of the psychiatric journals carried a paper on an unusual accidental death of a woman following coital foreplay.
Her lover had an impulse to blow air into her vagina which he proceeded to do vigorously. She had just stopped menstruating and her vascular system was therefore directly vulnerable. She complained of pain immediately and died within a few minutes—a rather gruesome outcome to what began as an erotic whim.
COMMENT: Or as a well-known Berkeley backgammon expert said, “no, no baby, blow is just a figure of speech!”
QUESTION. Could you please tell me if there is any other word for “clitoris?” That’s just too scientifically proper for bedroom talk, but neither my boyfriend nor any of my other friends have been able to find one that seems natural to say.
We agreed that “clit” from Candy was only a little bit better so your suggestions will be appreciated.
ANSWER: Three syllables does seem out of proportion but I’ve never heard another word for this unique organ which has pleasure as its only known function. Perhaps there are readers with other suggestions.
QUESTION: I am a single girl of 23 who has a most frustrating problem.
I am unable to reach a climax (except through cunnilingus or masturbation) because I have a hooded clitoris.
I know there is an operation to remove the hood, hut I am also sure I could not afford it. Therefore, I write to you to ask if you might know of any positions that would help me reach a climax.
I have tried all the well-known positions (and other types too) but be damned if I can ever climax through intercourse!
ANSWER: I doubt that a “hooded” clitoris is the cause of your complaint and surgical procedures seldom are the cure.
Sexology Magazine (a useful source of information, don’t be put off by the lurid covers) recently featured an article claiming a useful treatment for this very common problem.
If a woman can reach a climax through masturbation or manipulation by her partner, she is gradually trained to reach orgasm through intercourse. A kind of conditioning lakes place. The climax is achieved first when penetration begins and eventually during complete intercourse. (A female’s orgasm is almost always caused by clitoral stimulation, direct or indirect.)
Patience and perfect frankness between partners is required if this treatment is to be effective.
QUESTION: Your recent remarks on the function of the scrotum have stimulated me to ask for your comments on a related personal problem.
Normally my scrotum is completely relaxed, causing my testicles to dangle in an unsightly manner. Occasionally (and unpredictably) it tightens but usually not at an appropriate time, as when on view prior to intercourse.
Although this has vexed me since adolescence, I have never felt it was a great problem. This past summer. however, I had a couple of really great free beach experiences, during one of which I miraculously managed to keep a tight scrotum most of the time.
Since I now feel the free beach scene is the only beach scene worth making, I am writing in hopes you can suggest some treatment or exercise that would enable me to step onto a free beach next summer with a self-assurance I now lack.
ANSWER. The cremasteric muscles controlling the scrotum are not voluntarily activated so unless you can gain this control through yoga.
I) While lying in the sand have a friend run up, shriek loudly and throw ice water on your abdomen. When this has been done five or six limes unexpectedly you’ll he ready for the next step which is-
2) While lying in the sun have a friend run up and shriek loudly, this time omitting the ice water. The desired reaction will he the same.
3) With a little imagination you can work out variations of this reflex conditionings that even the thought of being on a beach can put you up tight. Or you can allow your body to do its thing, relax. dig the free beach scene and hang loose.
Dr. Schoenfeld welcomes your questions. Write to him c/o P.O. Box 9002. Berkeley Calif 94719.