What a Difference a Day Makes

A Premature Obituary: Wernher Von Braun 1912-soon


Fifth Estate # 280, February 1977

Werner Von Braun, 1912-soon

Werner Von Braun, 1912-soon

Although Wernher Von Braun is still alive, though bed-ridden with a terminal case of cancer, we feel that this is the appropriate time to wish him a speedy death.

The inventor of the V-2 rocket for Hitler during World War II and author of the book I Shoot for the Stars (and hit London?), Von Braun is directly responsible for the death of thousands of Britons during the final days of the War.

After a falling out with Hitler (Von Braun wanted to send a V-2 rocket over London every two minutes, while Hitler, humanitarian that he was, thought that one every hour was a fair exchange), Von Braun decided to seek employment with a more understanding government (England wanted him hung) and is now head of the U.S. rocket research division. Still shooting for the stars.

Well Wernher, we can’t say it was nice having you around, but we do have one regret: that you will die at a plush hospital in the hands of trained physicians instead of at the hands of the workers you so eagerly slaughtered!